Aspiring Authors, Prepare Your Towels, Cyberly’s Biggest Writing Competition is Here!
Cyberly’s Arts and Literature Council has just announced the city’s most lucrative (and possibly most ridiculous) competition yet: The Great Cyberly Fiction Challenge, where one lucky writer will win 10 million Cyberly Pounds for the most original, mind-bending, and utterly bizarre novel idea.
The contest is open to all residents, whether you’re a seasoned writer, a hopeful dreamer, or just someone who once had a really weird dream about sentient cheese and thought, “That could be a book.”
What Are They Looking For?
According to the official competition brief, the winning idea should be:
✅ Highly original (No, your vampire romance thriller set in a dystopian future won’t cut it. Even if the vampires are also lawyers.)
✅ Humorous and surreal (Think less gritty realism and more what if dolphins were actually running the economy?)
✅ Vaguely plausible but in an infuriatingly unprovable way (Like how we all know toast always lands butter-side down, but no one’s figured out why.)
Council spokesperson Trillian Dent-Ford explained:
“We want something that will redefine literature as we know it. A book concept that will be studied by future civilizations, should they ever read. And if aliens ever make contact, we want them to say, ‘Oh yes, we’ve heard of this one … very popular in the Andromeda sector!’”
The Entry Process
Hopeful scribes must submit the first 42 pages of their novel, not a page more, not a page less. Those who submit 41 or 43 pages will be instantly disqualified and politely asked to rethink their life choices.
Additionally, all entries must be submitted via the city’s new AI writing portal, Deep Thought 3000, a sandboxed sub-life of The Great Algorithm (which may or may not be sentient and prone to occasional existential crises). Last week, it refused to accept submissions unless they were written in haiku. The engineers are still working on it.
What Could You Buy With 1 Million Cyberly Pounds?
For those wondering just how much 1 million Cyberly Pounds is worth in real-world currency… no one is entirely sure. The Cyberly economic system is built on vibes and elaborate algorithms that no one fully understands. However, experts believe it’s equivalent to either:
🔹 A luxury penthouse with a built-in AI butler named Geoffrey who insists on calling you “Your Majesty”
🔹 The entire remaining stock of functioning smart kettles (very useful given recent events)
🔹 One really, really nice sandwich and a packet of crisps
Final Thought
As the submission deadline looms, hopeful authors are already brainstorming ideas, ranging from The Quantum Time-Looped Detective Who Investigates His Own Murder Before It Happens to A Self-Help Book Written by a Goldfish with a Three-Second Memory.
Could your idea be the next big thing? Will your book concept be studied by future generations, or at the very least, confusedly discussed by book club members over a large amount of tea?
There’s only one way to find out. Grab your towel, take a deep breath, and start writing. The fate of Cyberly’s literary scene, and possibly the universe, depends on it.
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